So I don't know if I blogged about it but in Jan. I can't find the post if I did, but we had a little argument with my in-laws (my bro-in-law and some friends moved upstairs) about utilities etc... they said one thing and then they would talk to BIL and then change what they said! My husband got upset because my BIL doesn't trust us, he wants a copy of the bills every month etc... anyways one night we got an email and it really upset my husband and honestly he did have to do something and he doesn't get home until late at night and they are an hour later so it was even more late for them so they got upset etc... anyway, WE worked it out because we made my BIL come talk to us (why is he such a baby and making his parents the middle man? he's 30!) also we were right but that's not the point. So that was the middle of Jan. We haven't heard from them since!!!! Also remember my Christmas time with them?
SO AFTER 6 WEEKS THEY FINALLY CALL US AND THE FIRST THING THEY SAY IS "WE ARE COMING ON THE 18TH"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hate when they do this, that is what they did at christmas time, no we are thinking of coming up or is it alright if we stay with you.... well I was totally shocked all I said was "Oh" and paused because I was shocked and then thinking....I think they thought I was not happy about it (which I wasn't) because they then said "we don't want to interrupt any plans you may have" I said "I don't go anywhere or do anything" then they said "is it okay if we stay in that room with the extra bed?" (this is the first time they have ever asked, it must have been because I didn't sound enthusiastic. And hello look at my health you think we CAN go anywhere? if I could I would!!!!! They will be here a whole week, the whole week of spring break!!!! I was so mad because they ruined my christmas break with my husband, I mean he's in school all day everyday but Sunday! I don't get any time with him and he does get a few days off for spring break so I was so mad that they were going to ruin it (but luckily my husband told me he has the weekend off before they come up! Yippee!!!!). Plus (remember back in Dec.) they have complained so much about finances that I can't believe they are going to another $1000 and come up just two months later! Don't complain about money then!!!
The other reason I hesitated was because we have been keeping everyone away, I haven't gone to church in a couple weeks and we don't have any visitors I really have to stay away from viruses, plus the flu shot is only 40% effective this year! So we are really concerned about that, first even if they are healthy (which they always get sick when they come up here, in dec. she even went to the dr. and got on antibiotics!hello!) they are flying for a couple hours and I'm sure will have some germs on them when they get here! I need a detox station, then they most likely will be coming and going and that just increases the risk of bringing something into my house. Honestly if I get something especially the flu, that will be the end of me!
I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO, DO I CALL AND TELL THEM NOT TO STAY WITH US? BUT THEN WILL THEY BE OFFENDED BEYOND BELIEF, THEY ALREADY HATE ME THOUGH AND FOR SOME REASON CANT TAKE OR ACCEPT THE STATE OF MY HEALTH, IT'S LIKE THEY DON'T BELIEVE I'M THIS BAD, LIKE I'M MAKING IT UP. I'VE TALKED TO MY HUSBAND AND HE'S REALLY CONCERNED ABOUT THE GERMS BUT OF COURSE HE DOESN'T WANT TO SAY YOU CAN'T STAY WITH US AND BE RUDE. But then again in Dec. they stayed three days with his Aunt, why can't they stay there? because they will be visiting them and then coming back to my house and bringing all those germs (they have a lot of kids/grandkids).
WHAT A WAY TO RUIN MY BIRTHDAY MONTH!!!!!!!!!!
Sidenote: if you remember or reread my december post about them you will remember that they 'used their key' to let themselves into my house, well we changed the locks! I'm sure they won't be to happy about that! But I couldn't stand the thought that my BIL and anyone that lives upstairs could get into my house (especially when I'm there) we were really concerned at the time that my BIL would try and take Chugs while we were gone too. Ahhh can't wait!:)
Another Sidenote: I just noticed that blogger is different with different web browers, I use Firefox and Safari and in Safari's I noticed that it has a compose tab and that's where I can make my text big and small and different colors but that option isn't in firefox's why?
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6 comments:
The best thing to do isn't always the easiest- but if it were us...I would have my husband call his mom and tell her that it was his spring break and that he was looking forward to spending time with his family and also that the doctor suggested limiting contact this time of year so you don't get sick. Maybe even call your aunt or whoever they stayed with before and talk to them ahead of time about the concerns and ask if they can stay with them. Apologize for not saying something before- but that you were put on the spot etc. Not offending someone shouldn't be higher on the list than getting sick. I would dread making that phone call, but it is what it is.
Take care and good luck.
Roro, why don't they stay upstairs with your BIL?
Hannah, I really do think I'm going to call them but also thanks for suggesting I contact his aunt too, good idea.
Chrissy, He has roommates (although I said they could put an inflateable mattress in the front living room that they have no furniture in) and remember I have "the room with the extra bed in it" Grrrr...
I agree with Hannah. Be truthful and forthright and sometimes people might get their feelings hurt but hopefully a whole new way to communicate might evolve.
Good luck, sticky family issues are always that...sticky!
so I am not really sure why when I post it doesnt show up the first time because I totally posted yesterday. Anyway, I am so sorry that your in-laws do this to you. Its always funny to me how little people get concerned about their getting me sick. Yet, Bens cousins that we just met are already concerned about it when we have plans to get together and let us know how thier health is so we can make the decision. Crazy! By the way I have missed you on my blog:(
Okay, I mean this in a supportive way. Not a preachy way.
Remember the choices post you did a little while ago? Well, here is your chance to put into action the feelings you had. You get to chose how to feel and how to react to your in laws. You can chose to feel like they have robbed you of spring break, or you can chose to welcome them into your home and enjoy the time you have together.
I know it probably isn't what you wanted to hear, but I really mean it in the nicest way. Honest.
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