Where to start?

I have so much to catch up on, so much to type! I need to write about our sudden move and then my hospital visit with ambulance ride.... do I get into it? do you ever feel like it's too much to type? although usually once I get started it turns out okay, hopefully that will happen here. Let's try...

Again it's kinda hard to start a story about the in-laws without background stuff etc.. but for my sake I will ask you to research my other posts on them or just try and catch on to what's going on.... they show up, okay back track...we have been living in their basement and renting out the upstairs for a year and half with no problems whatsoever, the couple graduated and moved the beginning of Jan. instead of renting it out for more money they decide to let their other son and some roommates move in (from the very beginning we knew it was going to be bad but we're adults and we can do it) so right off the bat for some reason there is problems with the utilities don't ask why or how because if you pay half then it's half, his brother wanted a copy of the bills each month which was fine but can you say 'I don't trust you' any louder? so there was some calls back and forth he called his parents they called us blah blah, finally we brought his brother downstairs and walked him through it asked if it was okay what he thought would it work blah blah, as adults we worked it out! amazing! why involve his parents? so the last time we talked to them in Jan. was a little tiff over the utilities. They don't call for six weeks, that's right, not once in Feb. did they call (and they even had an extra day!)

They call, I say 'hello' and the first thing they say is 'we're coming up on the 18th!' I love how they just announce it and one expect us to be happy and two to just assume that our house is available for them to sleep in! So that's all they said, they didn't tell me when they were coming in and they didn't even talk to my husband! They were coming just for them and only staying with us because technically 'it's their house' the day arrived and their flight was cancelled so they called to tell me that and that they were coming two days later, again no time, I asked them around what time so I could prepare myself, they said around 5pm, well that day they call my husband in the morning and say 'I hear there is a problem with picking us up at the airport' no, no problem his brother has to do it because MH is in school and had a major test coming up (and plus THEY NEVER ASKED FOR A RIDE! OR TOLD HIM WHEN THEY WERE COMING OR WHAT FLIGHT!) oh well his brother has a class at 6 so he can't blah blah, MH said he couldn't and that his brother would just have to miss class! Or they have an aunt that lives near the airport and MH could then pick them up later if they wanted.

So we are waiting that night, haven't heard a word from them, finally about 10:30 at night because we are thinking of going to bed we try calling them to find out if they are coming, turns out they are going to stay with the aunt overnight! Thanks for letting us know!!!! Then I tell them that the next day I have a dr. appoint. and we will not be home until 6pm or so were they going to be coming sooner (because I want to lock the door and protect my dogs) they were going skiing so it should be fine. We were on our way home and they call....we can't get into your house....(again what's the big deal if his brother lives upstairs? they can just hang out there!!!!).

They gave me my birthday present that night (it was the following tuesday) she had put together a scrapbook of the dogs, finally a nice present (they totally forgot me last year, that's another story). They go skiing again the next day and it's tradition to all go out to eat for birthdays and that night was the only free night so we went (oddly enough his brother didn't join us, had some excuse..)

Sunday was Easter we were going to my parents it had been pre-planned before they told us they were coming, and they were going to go to his aunts house, we have church in the morning and with my health I needed a nap before we were to leave, we get all settled for a nap and get the dogs quiet and his mom knocks on the door and opens it a crack!!!! HELLO PRIVACY! she tells us it's really cold upstairs and his brothers mad and not to play with a switch that goes with the heater, blah blah, okay thanks for waking up the dogs making them bark now we all have to quiet down again. Short time later another knock and opening of the door, we are thinking of selling the house because you guys can't get along something about utilities blah blah, thanks for waking us and the dogs again, my husband and I are talking about stuff know.... A THIRD TIME, We've decided to sell the sell we need to have a family conference some time, well by that time we are awake and ready to talk so we say fine let's do it know but his brother is mad that's why they said later (I say grow up and be a man, he is 30 after all, can't you talk about it?) so we sit down with his parents first and start talking about things and we were going to finally bring everything out they have said some things to us that we have let slide and know we want an explanation. And we said it was fine for them to sell the house, I think they should because then it won't be a headache for them, but that won't solve their sons not getting along.

So we brought up some of the hurtful things that his mom had said in Nov. I told them I feel like they want and are just waiting for me to die so that MH can make more money or get roommates and pay more rent, all they said was a quiet no. As for the things his mom said, she said she had thought about what she said and really nothing else, definately no apology for what she said, then she got up and went to go get his brother! She swept it under the carpet like everything else. So she comes down and says that MH brother doesn't consider him a brother or us family anymore, we are like fine, whatever, he comes in and right off the bat is swearing and telling us that he doesn't care the ____about us pointing at each one of us (my husband and I) and telling us this, that this is all business, fine... he was bringing up such stupid stuff that we didn't even know about and if you have the attitude that someone is out to be mean to you then that's how things are going to look! I mean you can take the same situation and from our view point it meant this, like MH had to move his golf clubs away from my oxygen stuff in the garage because it has to be clean and clear, well he was taking it that MH was just being mean and spitefull etc... tons of stuff like that, as for the utilites, one of the things was I had told him the amount and he told me he would get it for me that night, he didn't so we bugged him the next day, and the next etc... so he was mad that he didn't have a 'grace period', all he had to do was not tell me he was going to get them to me that night! I didn't tell him too! He could have said can I get this to you in two days? I would have been fine with that, he's the one that said he would do it that night!!!!!!

Part of the conversation was about Chugs, now back in Dec. when they were here we talked about him moving in and that he would then want Chugs to live with him and we said no he hasn't proven he can take care of her and besides she loves us and our home and her sister. Also they are single guys and Chugs loves people food and you get my point, in fact when he did have her they actually had to go have her stomach pumped because she ate a whole bag of chocolate! so his mom and I were talking about all these things and she realized that Chugs would be safer with us, but she could visit upstairs and we said yes. So during this conversation I turned to his mom and said that she had told me she didn't want Chugs up there, SHE DENIED IT!!!!!!! I couldn't believe it! and call it a coincidence I'm not pointing fingers but the two times Chugs went upstairs without one of us there she threw up that night, both times, just a coincidence.

It just got worse and worse, he was swearing a lot, MH told him he didn't have to swear so much and he said 'that's how I talk' and he said something else and MH said 'that's not very Christlike' and he said I don't care the *&@# &*^#@ about Christ! And his parents are still in the room!!!!! Then he pointed his fingers/hand at MH and told him he didn't care the F**** about him and then turned to me and said the same thing, MH thinks he said the B-word too I don't know because when he did that you could feel the hatred in his voice and you could fill this evil nasty spirit, I have never felt that way in my life, MH husband doesn't remember this happening but he sprang up when he said those things to me and I don't know quite how to explain it, but what my husband remembers is he was on top of his brother thinking 'what am I doing' and his Dad and everyone else was yelling 'Stop!stop!' they did, and MH was just saying 'don't ever speak to my wife like that again, you don't ever speak to someone's wife like that' his brother left and he had been sitting on the container of dog food so it was busted and stuff so his parents started cleaning up, I am really shook up and MH is too, he's never done something like that in his life! it just happened! I went to my room with the dog (I hadn't let Chugs go from my lap half-way through the conversation), my husband came in a little while later to just calm down, he was shaking! He kept telling his parents he's sorry he doesn't know why that happened etc... well, as his mom is sweeping up dog food she is muttering under her breath, 'all you guys care about is money' as in what we said to them... What!

So we were in our room and they don't even say bye they just leave to go to dinner. I was so frightened and scared, I honestly couldn't stay in my house any longer, I couldn't live underneath his brother with that hatred/evil feeling, whenever I thought about it...I don't know, so we called some friends that had said if we were ever in a bind and needed help they would help, they happen to have their basement free at the time and we packed up my immediate stuff and went over (didn't make it to Easter dinner, in fact my Dad and brothers wanted to come down and help and whatever) so that night MH went back with our friends suburban to get more stuff (I have a lot of medical stuff) and his parents came home and went upstairs! they never said anything to MH and even if they didn't notice the moving out right then they sure did when they went down to sleep that night!

They never called, they didn't fly out until Wednesday, three days after we left, no phone call, no note left nothing. All I want honestly isn't neccessarily an apology just a 'what (his brother) said was inappropriate' could they not fill the hatred or evil spirit? if not they are totally past feeling, is it because they are afraid of making him more mad? of losing him because MH is the good son and would never do something like that..etc...they did send us an email, asking if we had gotten everything out of the basement yet, also they hope we are happy in our new location and they keep us in their prayers.

So for now we changed email/blog/phone because if they don't want to talk about real stuff or acknowledge anything is wrong we don't want to talk to them. And I will bet you anything they are not going to sell the house anymore they will rent out the basement too. Oh also because his brother was paying more rent than us (don't get me started on the financial differences between us, a single person with a full-time job compared to a married couple where one can't work, has a terminal illness and the other one works part-time) he gets more house priviledges like parking in the garage etc...

It is very nice to get live in a place with no strings attached and they aren't hanging it over our heads that we can't pay a lot of rent. Although of all people you would think that parents would be more understanding and more helpful than friends but no.

So that's the jist of that. Hands are sore now will do the hospital visit later.